Do You Need Creative Support?
“Self-trust is the first secret of success.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
How secure are you in your creativity?
Do you need others to tell you you’re good?
There’s a line in the novel The Fountainhead that I love. The protagonist, maverick architect Howard Roark - the embodiment of self-confidence - shows one of his drawings to a sculptor, Mallory, who he wants to hire.
Roark asks, “Like it?” to which Mallory responds, “Don’t use stupid words.”
Until that moment, Roark never came close to needing validation or approval. His artistic vision is iron-clad. He will not bend or make alterations. He knows he’s good. Mallory knows it, too.
In the book, The War of Art, Steven Pressfield says this about “support” groups and workshops: “The more energy we spend stoking up on support from colleagues and loved ones, the weaker we become and the less capable of handling our business.”
I think it’s a balancing act. One of the joys of creating anything is in sharing it with others. We all want feedback. It can be very discouraging to work on something that gets no response. No response can feel worse than a negative one.
Obviously, a novelist wants her reader to like her book. A comedian wants to get laughs. We all want to hear, “I love your work.” But when we don’t hear it, do we crumble and quit? Do we deem ourselves unworthy? Or are we secure enough to know we’ve done our best job?
There’s a subtle difference between needing support - needing that “I love you” - and asking for guidance or perspective. If we want a pat on the head, we can run to Mom. But if we want want honest help, we need to seek people who won’t mince words.
There’s also a difference between launching your work hoping to hear “That’s great!” and launching your work to simply say, “Here it is.”
Can you feel it?
When I was a kid, I used to sing for the neighbors when they visited for coffee. I love praise and approval…still do. (I’m a Leo - we love the spotlight). Applause is addictive.
But we can’t build our house on it, because when nobody claps, then what?
How do we build creative self-confidence? Hard work on our craft. Receiving unsolicited praise from people we respect. Remembering our victories.
No doubt, a kind word of encouragement always helps, and it feels good to give it. Everyone gets discouraged from time to time. When a friend reminds you of how talented you are, (like Roark does for Mallory in The Fountainhead) it can make a huge difference. We’re all in this together. This blog is here to inspire, after all.
Still…is your creative house built on sand or rock? Do you have an “inner candle flame that never flickers”?
Do you know you’re good?
Your thoughts?
I tend to know I’m not so good and have way too much to learn, so it’s always a thrill when someone claps. Sometimes I do create a piece I’m exceptionally proud of and get a little disappointed if no one agrees with me, although it doesn’t shake my opinion of it.
For me it depends on which craft I’m talking about. I designed my canyon for the business I am starting up. I am sure about that. I had a mentor doubt that I was making the right choice by pushing through with this idea, but I knew it was a good design and program so I didn’t listen. Other people were very supportive but in spite of that, I know it’s good.
I also feel good about the crosses I make. They are made of twisted and curled wire with beads. They are very pretty. I still like it when people compliment them bacause I enjoy bringing joy to others.
Now my writing is another thing. I never know how that is being met by others so I do love the validation there. I also think that the writing is more intimate and heart bearing. If that is rejected, it’s like I am rejected at my core. OUCH! So my soil there would be closer to sand that rock.
Beth - nicely put. I think you speak for a lot of people. Now and then I’ll sing or play guitar for people…I consider myself an amateur at it, and when people compliment me I go, “Nah. It was okay.”
Laurie - You’ve made me think: maybe creative people in general are ultra sensitive to responses and rejection. We put our heart and soul into our work…we wear our hearts on our sleeve…etc.
That comment of Beth’s reminded me of one of the quirks about performing magic tricks- Sometimes the thing you’ve created or performed impresses yourself more than the audience! Probably because you know how much behind-the-scenes work is involved.
I prefer the unspoken responses coming from the viewer of my art. I enjoy observing their responses from accross the room. The grimace or the smile…its much less painful peeking from behind a cocktail napkin!
: )
I think artists are notoriously sensitive - it’s definitely part of the territory. An artist puts his or her very heart out for everyone to see, and if it is not accepted, or is criticized, it can be potentially devastating. On the other side of it, an artist needs to thicken up, and to be able to take criticism as part of the whole package. Part of the art is the reaction, if one is putting it out there for all to see. And some reactions might not be positive ones.
That being said, I’m not sure whether it’s enough to do the art, just for art’s sake, or whether one needs an “audience,” or people to interact with, in order for the artist to feel complete (or for the art itself to be complete). Does art need an audience? Is it art if it exists in isolation, like the proverbial tree falling in the forest? Sometimes it seems like it’s enough just to do the art - like when Buddhists do sand paintings, for example. But I think that a lot of artists love the thought of sharing themselves with the world, and so the connection with others is then essential.
(By the way, I can TOTALLY relate to that Leo thing - being one, myself. So very right on the money!
I think Roark was in the right to ask Mallory his opinion. Feedback from artists you respect is useful, even if it’s a different art form. Maybe HR should have phrased it differently than “like it?”, but no matter how gifted an artist he is, he becomes all the more fictional if he’s above criticism from non-hacks. In the book, Roark makes a distinction between Mallory and himself. Mallory can create alone in his studio, whereas an architect, by definition has to win the approval of whomever’s footing the bill.
In general, I think artists should look for feedback from people they respect while they are working on something and make revisions based on those notes. This can be a little dangerous since art is subjective and even smart artists can offer bad advice. A decent rule to follow is if a number of people are giving you the same note, it’s worth taking.
Great insights, Mark, Krystin, Ophelia & Tom. I enjoyed reading your thoughts and feedback. Thanks for chiming in.
Hi Mark,
This reminds me of blogging. We can write and post for months and no one shows up to leave a comment. If we don’t have it in us to carry on, our blog will die. To me, that’s sad, as we all have something important to share. Patience and persistence do pay off.
nice refreshing article, thanks for sharing.
Barbara - you ain’t kidding!
Paresh - thank you and welcome!